Inspired by the soft words it’s ok…Jess relax
Deep breath, doing as I’m told, seduce me I love that
Passion behind the touches, eyes closed in wholesome glee…
Suck me here …fingers there, slowly part me at the knee
Godly I feel lifted, how do you know your way around me
Pantin’ short breathes, exploring new sex, wet secretions release from me
Affair without penetration isn’t really an affair
And sex without connection is a mental warfare
Jess keep me cumin, keep me throbbing, keep on loving on me
My first time and it’s so beautiful, did I mention she’s a SHE?
Jess when you thought it was hard..
He reminds you that it could’ve been you
And Jess when you thought it was over
Some how you pulled through
Jess when that rain continued with storms
The sky began to revel blue
And Jess when you thought you failed
He showed you that was too little for you
Jess when you couldn’t hear his voice
Your sight was renew
And Jess when you thought it was bad
He showed you he was God
Jess he favors you
Stand up, you’re not falling
Open your eyes so you can see
Stand up, it’s not over
choose you, that’s priority
Stand up, this is a season
What’s broken will be fixed
Stand up, you are Queen
with or without you are worth it
Stand up, this will be hard
take one step then two
The third will be more comfortable put the focus for you
Stand up, inhale, exhale then breathe
Stand up, use the wall if you need
Jess, stand up Queen you are the seed
Days of opening my eyes…no aches on me
Rolling over to love…Lord who prayed for me?
In no need of necessities, it took a while to see
My cup is at capacity
This PEACE encourages me
F A I L U R E ISN’T F A I L U R E UNLESS YOU DON’T L E A R N FROM IT
And life doesn’t teach lessons unless it hurts a bit
So look up for direction, and head high when you pray
Because Joy comes in the morning and troubles don’t last always…….
If you’ve been reading blog, you must know that writing is a release for me. I pray that you all have something…one thing, that helps you center yourself. “The Darkness Jess Before Dawn” is going to be my short cut biography. I feel that with narrating my story, it frees me, not that I’m bound by anything but free in a sense that I’m holding back nothing.
I’m a Capricorn, the goat, and everything they say about Capricorns closely defines me. I was born in NY but grew up in Charleston, SC. As a child I walked, ran and explored the streets of downtown Charleston. My mother left my father up north after suffering from domestic violence. I remember vividly growing up among all my cousins, aunts and uncles. I remember fun, I remember love, I remember childhood.
At 16 my sister had my first niece, my first child, at the time I was 10. After she had my niece, I no longer had a big sister, I was the big sister. I transitioned from childhood to motherhood. My mother had expectations for me now. My sister slowly left my niece behind as she transitioned into a new lifestyle surrounded with drugs. So, at the age of 10/11 I was more than a pre-teen, I was an aunt with mother-like responsibilities. I too learned how to make bottles, change diapers and rock a baby.
Fast forward three years later, we move to North Charleston, Dorchester Waylan to be exact, by this time my sister has had my second niece and we are living 8 to a three bedroom house. I was mentally overwhelmed, I was vulnerable for attention, I was independent so no one was checking. And just like that I became a victim……
I eat, sleep, dream, breath this business !!
My first flip! Check the curb appeal that I’m creating. Am I done? Goodness NO!
PLEASE NOTE: I have NEVER quit anything in my LIFE! So, I’m still sensitive about this shit…….
January 2, 2019, I made the decision to resign from my teaching job overseas. The decision haunted me to days. Well, actually weeks. Teaching in Doha inspired me. Although I only spent 5 months there, I learned so much about my role as a teacher. I have taught kindergarten for 7 years and I grew levels on levels in terms of professionalism and purpose. Teaching is such a fulling career. I must admit that it is a difficult job but in the same energy it gives you a sense of satisfaction. I love teaching.
However, my job in Doha took me away from my children and my husband. Everyday I felt like I was choosing. Choosing this job, this experience, this paycheck over my children and it sickened me. My family needed me and I needed them. Not until I was separated from my family did I realize that they are home. Home makes the heart happy and wherever they are, is where I need to be. I pray that an opportunity like this arises for us again but in a form where we are all together. My job in Doha asked me to contact them via email if I ever want to return so that made me happy. I know I am a great teacher with a lot to offer but FAMILY FIRST.
In that order!!!
It’s something about the depth of his dark
The melanin of his skin, the strength of his bark
I swear to you it humbles me each time
I look into him and see sunshine
I see love, I see him, I see me and I see them
I bend at my knees to show respect to him
My king let me taste you… pour your royalty to the brim
Don’t bring me up until your ready, you’re ready to see me
And when you’re ready, baby please, just love and protect me.
So on my knees for my king ….
Its just a position for me
A position where I get to show humility.
Because no one in this world ever appreciates you
or show you this love like this queen could do
The mix of our melanins …Im destined for you
A black man of dark skin with the world as his opponent
Taking place as his queen I don’t say I Jess own it