Jess Keep Me Cumin…

Inspired by the soft words it’s ok…Jess relax

Deep breath, doing as I’m told, seduce me I love that

Passion behind the touches, eyes closed in wholesome glee…

Suck me here …fingers there, slowly part me at the knee

Godly I feel lifted, how do you know your way around me

Pantin’ short breathes, exploring new sex, wet secretions release from me

Affair without penetration isn’t really an affair

And sex without connection is a mental warfare

Jess keep me cumin, keep me throbbing, keep on loving on me

My first time and it’s so beautiful, did I mention she’s a SHE?

Jess when you thought it was bad

Jess when you thought it was hard..

He reminds you that it could’ve been you

And Jess when you thought it was over

Some how you pulled through

Jess when that rain continued with storms

The sky began to revel blue

And Jess when you thought you failed

He showed you that was too little for you

Jess when you couldn’t hear his voice

Your sight was renew

And Jess when you thought it was bad

He showed you he was God

Jess he favors you

Jess, stand up

Stand up, you’re not falling

Open your eyes so you can see

Stand up, it’s not over

choose you, that’s priority

Stand up, this is a season

What’s broken will be fixed

Stand up, you are Queen

with or without you are worth it

Stand up, this will be hard

take one step then two

The third will be more comfortable put the focus for you

Stand up, inhale, exhale then breathe

Stand up, use the wall if you need

Jess, stand up Queen you are the seed

Jess asking “Lord who prayed for me?”

Days of opening my eyes…no aches on me

Rolling over to love…Lord who prayed for me?

In no need of necessities, it took a while to see

My cup is at capacity

This PEACE encourages me

F A I L U R E    ISN’T     F A I L U R E    UNLESS    YOU    DON’T   L E A R N   FROM   IT

And life doesn’t teach lessons unless it hurts a bit

So look up for direction, and head high when you pray

Because Joy comes in the morning and troubles don’t last always…….

The Darkness Jess before Dawn….Pt.1

If you’ve been reading blog, you must know that writing is a release for me. I pray that you all have something…one thing, that helps you center yourself. “The Darkness Jess Before Dawn” is going to be my short cut biography. I feel that with narrating my story, it frees me, not that I’m bound by anything but free in a sense that I’m holding back nothing.

I’m a Capricorn, the goat, and everything they say about Capricorns closely defines me. I was born in NY but grew up in Charleston, SC. As a child I walked, ran and explored the streets of downtown Charleston. My mother left my father up north after suffering from domestic violence. I remember vividly growing up among all my cousins, aunts and uncles. I remember fun, I remember love, I remember childhood.

At 16 my sister had my first niece, my first child, at the time I was 10. After she had my niece, I no longer had a big sister, I was the big sister. I transitioned from childhood to motherhood. My mother had expectations for me now. My sister slowly left my niece behind as she transitioned into a new lifestyle surrounded with drugs. So, at the age of 10/11 I was more than a pre-teen, I was an aunt with mother-like responsibilities. I too learned how to make bottles, change diapers and rock a baby.

Fast forward three years later, we move to  North Charleston, Dorchester Waylan to be exact, by this time my sister has had my second niece and we are living 8 to a three bedroom house. I was mentally overwhelmed, I was vulnerable for attention, I was independent so no one was checking. And just like that I became a victim……

 

 

Jess want to say…”I quit”

PLEASE NOTE: I have NEVER quit anything in my LIFE! So, I’m still sensitive about this shit…….

January 2, 2019, I made the decision to resign from my teaching job overseas. The decision haunted me to days. Well, actually weeks. Teaching in Doha inspired me. Although I only spent 5 months there, I learned so much about my role as a teacher. I have taught kindergarten for 7 years and I grew levels on levels in terms of professionalism and purpose. Teaching is such a fulling career. I must admit that it is a difficult job but in the same energy it gives you a sense of satisfaction.  I love teaching.

However, my job in Doha took me away from my children and my husband. Everyday I felt like I was choosing. Choosing this job, this experience, this paycheck over my children and it sickened me. My family needed me and I needed them. Not until I was separated from my family did I realize that they are home. Home makes the heart happy and wherever they are, is where I need to be. I pray that an opportunity like this arises for us again but in a form where we are all together. My job in Doha asked me to contact them via email if I ever want to return so that made me happy. I know I am a great teacher with a lot to offer but FAMILY FIRST.

GOD

FAMILY

WORK

In that order!!!

Jess a few things…

So Jess a few things…

  1. School days are Sunday to Thursday ( So hard for me!)
  2. Fridays are like Sundays for church/mosque
  3. There are NO liquor stores here! Now that I have a RP I can apply for a liquor license but the process is ugh
  4. All of the Qatari families have nannies and drivers
  5. Just incase you didn’t know, this is the RICHEST country
  6. The most represented culture here is Indians from India then Filipinos
  7. If you go to the gas station, you will NEVER pump your own gas
  8. In shallah – hopefully, soon, in time, God willing
  9.  driving here is like grand theft auto
  10. Yalla- stop
  11.  Haram- forbidden by Islamic law
  12. As a women it is haram for a Qatari male to shake hands with me( I learned this the hard way)

Jess Own it

It’s something about the depth of his dark

The melanin of his skin, the strength of his bark  

I swear to you it humbles me each time 

I look into him and see sunshine

I see love, I see him, I see me and I see them

I bend at my knees to show respect to him  

My king let me taste you… pour your royalty to the brim

Don’t bring me up until your ready, you’re ready to see me 

And when you’re ready, baby please, just love and protect me.

So on my knees for my king ….

Its just a position for me

A position where I get to show  humility.

Because no one in this world ever appreciates you

or show you this love like this queen could do 

The mix of our melanins …Im destined for you

A black man of dark skin with the world as his opponent

Taking place as his queen I don’t say I Jess own it 

black love

 

 

Jess takes Cape Town, South Africa

November 2017, I told my husband that we should celebrate our 1st wedding anniversary in Cape Town, South Africa. I must say that this was the most AMAZING place I had ever traveled to! The culture, the land, the people, the food. OMG! If you ever have a chance to visit South Africa, please GO and take me with you 🙂 This is just a few pictures from our travel there.